When Discouragement Gripped Me

I’ve been praying circles around a loved one for the past 26 days.  I’ve prayed my heart out for strongholds to be broken and true freedom to be found.  I’ve prayed for healing.  I’ve prayed with all the strength within me.  I’ve prayed on the floor with tears and sobs erupting from within.  I’ve prayed believing the power of Jesus will break through.

But, last night and this morning, discouragement wanted to squelch my belief.  Feelings of despair and heartache set in.  Tears started to well up in my eyes suddenly.  A migraine attacked.  All the fight within me for my loved one seemed to dissipate.  

And then in worship, my precious Savior gave me the Word I needed.  It is found in John 11 with the story of Jesus, Mary, Martha, mourning Jews, and a dead man named Lazarus.  

Jesus is deeply moved by the grief of those who loved Lazarus.  He has wept.  He has felt their pain.  It has moved Him.  And, He is using it to build their faith...  to reveal and confirm He is Messiah.  Jesus goes to the tomb and gives instruction to move the stone.  Martha says, “But Lord, he has been there for four days.  There will be an odor.”  

I picture Jesus turning to her with great compassion.  I see Him looking deeply into her eyes with incredible love and peace as He says, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?” (John 11:40).

This morning in the quiet with fellow believers, I could hear the question whispering across my heart as well.  “Holly, have I not told you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”  

“But, Lord!” I cried in my mind, “What if it isn’t Your will for the stronghold to be broken?”  

“Believe, Child.  My will is for every stronghold to be broken... for all prisoners to be set free.” (Isaiah 61:1)

“But, what if my loved one doesn’t cooperate with You... or even hear You?”

“Believe, Child.  Am I not God?” (Isaiah 43:11-13; 46:8-10)

“I’m so afraid, Lord.  I’m so scared I am praying and fasting and seeking You with all my heart and it will not be done. But,honestly...  deep down... I’m terrified I will be disappointed again.”

“Believe, Child.  I have called you to fast and pray.  Be faithful with the call I have given you.  Watch.  Fast.  Pray.  Trust.  Surrender.  Believe.  And, you will see the glory of God.  Let Me be enough for you.  Let My ways be enough.  Let My plans be enough.  Wait for Me.  In the stillness hear Me.  I am God!” (Psalm 27:14, 46:10; Jeremiah 29:11; John 11:40; Ezra 8:23; Romans 15:13)

I do not know what you are praying through right now.  But, I pray with you that our amazing God encourages you today with the Word He has poured out over us with love.

~Holly